What really is a luxurious life?

Don't conflate luxury with ownership and extravagance.

The other day in conversation with friends, someone said that they are not interested in a luxurious life. So, I asked her to explain what luxury meant to her.

In response, she resorted to the conventional clichés: “Well, I am not interested in designer clothes or having a private plane or a Vigneto dinner set.”

Clearly, in her mind, luxury was something that had to be extravagant, even superfluous, and indicates ownership.

I was listening to an American from Missouri describe his lifestyle. He said that he and his family (wife and 3 little kids) make it a point to go for walks together. And all they do is talk, admire nature, and enjoy each other’s company. For someone like me living in Mumbai, I definitely consider that a luxury.

On the other hand, a friend in Mumbai tells me that she leads a much more luxurious life compared to her sibling who has migrated to the West. When I asked her to explain, she said, “I can afford a cook, a cleaner, a babysitter 6-days a week so I can go to work, and a driver. He cannot.”

I asked around, and requested individuals to tell me what they would consider a luxury. Clearly, it was an eyeopener.

A family to fall back on, is what one elderly gentleman said.

Good health, said another friend who is battling numerous ailments.

Being able to rent your own apartment and not having to share it with flat mates was another response.

Coming to a peaceful home is what someone said whose father was an alcoholic who often got abusive or even violent.

A widowed mother said luxury for her is the ability to help someone who has even less than she does. (This really got me!).

My part-time househelp said that luxury would be her husband helping with the household chores and cooking when she is exhausted.

For me personally, I consider 7 hours of deep uninterrupted sleep a luxury. I have forgotten what that is. It is a luxury I do not currently possess. I have never been in debt, but being debt-free is what I consider a luxury too.

So here’s what I want you to takeaway.

• Luxury need not be extravagant. Having a cup of adrak chai on a rainy day and not having to rush to work is a luxury I so cherish.

• The cost of luxury is not always monetary. Remember the above example of the American going for walks with his family? They make the time, the effort and the commitment.

• Luxury is not restricted to something you own. I think that is clear from all the above examples.

• Everyone’s idea of luxury differs. It means different things to different people. Don’t borrow someone else’s version of it.

You can’t define luxury. It could be status, comfort, convenience, materialism, ownership or experiences. It could be a mixture of some or all of them.   

Identify what is yours and be content with it. And yes, our idea of luxury will also evolve as we get older and experience life.

May you find and live your luxurious life.

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